Decoded Geek Code

GEEK TYPE CODE [GCM/H/IT/LS/L/SS/TW]

Geek of Computer Management, Geek of Humanities, Geek of Information Technology, Geek of Library Science, Geek of Literature, Geek of Social Science (Psychology, Sociology, etc.), Geek of Technical Writing.

GEEK DRESS CODE [d-(+)]

My tendencies on this issue range from: "I'm usually in jeans and a t-shirt.", to: "Good leisure-wear. Slacks, button-shirt, etc. No jeans, tennis shoes, or t-shirts."

GEEK SHAPE CODE [s--:]

I look up to damn near everybody.

GEEK AGE CODE [a]

My age is 30-39.

GEEK COMPUTERS CODE [C++(---)@>]

My tendencies on this issue range from: "Computers are a large part of my existence. When I get up in the morning, the first thing I do is log myself in. I play games or mud on weekends, but still manage to stay off of academic probation.", to: "If you even mention computers, I will rip your head off!" But that varies... But someday I'd like to say: "Computers are a tool, nothing more. I use it when it serves my purpose."

GEEK UNIX CODE [ULHISX++++$]

I use GNU/Linux, HPUX, IRIX , SunOS/Solaris and NeXT. I am the sysadmin. If you try and crack my machine don't be surprised if the municipal works department gets an "accidental" computer-generated order to start a new landfill on your front lawn or your quota is reduced to 4K. Getting paid for it!

GEEK PERL CODE [P++>++++]

Perl is a powerful programming tool. I don't write shell scripts anymore because I write them in Perl. But someday I'd like to say: "I don't write Perl, I speak it. Perl has superseded all other programming languages. I firmly believe that all programs can be reduced to a Perl one-liner. I use Perl to achieve U+++ status."

GEEK GNU/LINUX CODE [L++(+++)]

My tendencies on this issue range from: "I use GNU/Linux ALMOST exclusively on my system. I've given up trying to achieve GNU/Linux.God status, but welcome the OS as a replacement for DOS. I only boot to DOS to play games.", to: "I use GNU/Linux exclusively on my system. I monitor comp.os.linux.* and even answer questions sometimes."

GEEK EMACS CODE [E+()>+++]

My tendencies on this issue range from: "Emacs is great! I read my mail and news with it!", to: "Yeah, I know what emacs is, and use it as my regular editor." But someday I'd like to say: "Emacs is my login shell!! M-x doctor is my psychologist! I use emacs to control my TV and toaster oven! All you vi people don't know what you're missing! I read alt.relgion.emacs, alt.sex.emacs, and comp.os.emacs."

GEEK WORLD WIDE WEB CODE [W+++(--)@]

My tendencies on this issue range from: "I am a WebMaster. Don't even think about trying to view my homepage without the latest version of Netscape. When I'm not on my normal net connection, I surf the web using my Newton and a cellular modem.", to: "A pox on the Web! It wastes time and bandwidth and just gives the uneducated morons a reason to clutter the Internet." But that varies...

GEEK USENET CODE [N(++)]

My tendencies on this issue range from: "Usenet News? Sure, I read that once.", to: "I read all the news in a select handful of groups."

GEEK USENET ORACLE CODE [!o--]

I refuse to categorize myself on Usenet Oracle. But if I did participate in this category, I would characterize myself as follows: "Who needs answers from a bunch of geeks anyhow?"

GEEK KIBO CODE [K]

I know who Kibo is.

GEEK MICROSOFT WINDOWS CODE [w---(++++)@]

My tendencies on this issue range from: "Windows has set back the computing industry by at least 10 years. Bill Gates should be drawn, quartered, hung, shot, poisoned, disembowelled, and then REALLY hurt.", to: "I have Windows, Windows 95, Windows NT, and Windows NT Advanced Server all running on my SMP RISC machine. I haven't seen daylight in six months." But that varies...

GEEK OS/2 CODE [O]

I finally managed to get OS/2 installed but wasn't too terribly impressed.

GEEK MACINTOSH CODE [M++(--)@]

My tendencies on this issue range from: "I am a Mac guru. Anything those DOS putzes and unix nerds can do, I can do better, and if not, I'll write the damn software to do it.", to: "Macs do more than suck. They make a user stupid by allowing them to use the system without knowing what they are doing. Mac weenies have lower IQs than the fuzz in my navel." But that varies...

GEEK VMS CODE [V--]

I would rather smash my head repeatedly into a brick wall than suffer the agony of working with VMS. It's reminiscent of a dead and decaying pile of moose droppings. Unix rules the universe.

GEEK POLITICS & SOCIAL ISSUES CODE [PS++(+++)>+$]

My tendencies on this issue range from: "I give to liberal causes. I march for gay rights. I'm a card carrying member of the ACLU. Keep abortion safe and legal.", to: "Legalize drugs! Abolish the government. Fuck the draft!" But someday I'd like to say: "My whole concept of liberalism is that nobody has the right to tell anybody else what to do, on either side of the political fence. If you don't like it, turn the bloody channel. Getting paid for it!"

GEEK POLITICS & ECONOMIC ISSUES CODE [PE--(-)>$]

My tendencies on this issue range from: "Capitalism is evil! Government should provide the services we really need. Nobody should be rich.", to: "It's ok to increase government spending, so we can help more poor people. Tax the rich! Cut the defense budget!" But someday I'd like to say: "Getting paid for it!"

GEEK CYPHERPUNKS CODE [!Y+(++)]

I refuse to categorize myself on Cypherpunks. But if I did participate in this category, I would characterize myself as follows: "My tendencies on this issue range from: "I have an interest and concern in privacy issues, but in reality I am not really all that active or vocal.", to: "I am on the cypherpunks mailing list and active around Usenet. I never miss an opportunity to talk about the evils of Clipper and ITAR and the NSA. Orwell's 1984 is more than a story, it is a warning to our's and future generations. I'm a member of the EFF.""

GEEK PGP CODE [PGP++>-]

I have the most recent version and use it regularly. But someday I'd like to say: "I don't have anything to hide."

GEEK STAR TREK CODE [t+(---)@]

My tendencies on this issue range from: "It's a damn fine TV show and is one of the only things good on television any more.", to: "Star Trek SUCKS! It is the worst crap I have ever seen! Hey, all you trekkies out there, GET A LIFE! (William Shatner is a t---)." But that varies...

GEEK BABYLON 5 CODE [5++(-)@]

My tendencies on this issue range from: "Finally a show that shows what a real future would look like. None of this Picardian "Let's talk about it and be friends" crap. And what's this? We finally get to see a bathroom! Over on that Enterprise, they've been holding it for over seven years!", to: "This show is sub-par. The acting is wooden, the special effects are obviously poor quality. In general, it seems like a very cheap Star Trek ripoff." But that varies...

GEEK X FILES CODE [X++(-)]

My tendencies on this issue range from: "This is one of the better shows I've seen. I wish I'd taped everything from the start at SP, because I'm wearing out my EP tapes. I'll periodically debate online. I've Converted at least 5 people. I've gotten a YAXA.", to: "It's ok if you like paranoia and conspiracy stories, but, let's face it, it's crap."

GEEK ROLE-PLAYING CODE [!R-]

I refuse to categorize myself on Role-Playing. But if I did participate in this category, I would characterize myself as follows: "Gosh, what an utter waste of time!"

GEEK TELEVISION CODE [tv++()]

My tendencies on this issue range from: "I just leave the tv on, to make sure I don't miss anything.", to: "I watch only the shows that are actually worthwhile, such as those found on PBS."

GEEK BOOKS CODE [b++++(++)>$]

My tendencies on this issue range from: "I read a book a day. I have library cards in three states. I have discount cards from every major bookstore. I've ordered books from another country to get my Favorite Author Fix.", to: "I find the time to get through at least one new book a month." But someday I'd like to say: "Getting paid for it!"

GEEK DILBERT CODE [DI++>--]

I work with people that act a lot like Dilbert and his boss. But someday I'd like to say: "Don't read it, but I think the dog is kinda cute."

GEEK DOOM CODE [!D]

I refuse to categorize myself on Doom.

THE GEEK CODE [G--()]

My tendencies on this issue range from: "Not only a waste of time, but it obviously shows that this Hayden guy needs a life.", to: "I know what the geek code is and even did up this code."

GEEK EDUCATION CODE [e++>$]

Got a Baccalaureate degree. But someday I'd like to say: "Getting paid for it!"

GEEK HOUSING CODE [h---]

Married, (persons living romantically with someone might as well label themselves h---, you're as good as there already.)

GEEK RELATIONSHIPS CODE [r+++]

Found someone, dated, and am now married.

GEEK SEX CODE [x+++]

Female. I'm married, so I can get it (theoretically) whenever I want.


-----BEGIN GEEK CODE BLOCK-----
Version: 3.1
GCM/H/IT/LS/L/SS/TW d-(+) s--: a C++(---)@> ULHISX++++$ P++>++++ L++(+++)
E+()>+++ W+++(--)@ N(++) !o-- K w---(++++)@ O M++(--)@ V-- PS++(+++)>+$
PE--(-)>$ !Y+(++) PGP++>- t+(---)@ 5++(-)@ X++(-) !R- tv++() b++++(++)>$
DI++>-- !D G--() e++>$ h--- r+++ x+++
------END GEEK CODE BLOCK------

This Geek Code was automatically decoded by a script written by Bradley M. Kuhn.

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Please, report any decoding problems to the author of the decoding script:

Bradley M. Kuhn
geekcode@ebb.org

but he rarely has time to work on it anymore or even fix bugs.